･°❀.It's okay to not know your aesthetic*:･°❀

I have this silly little fear.

It’s the fear of losing the self.

Not being able to look in the mirror and know who I am, what I stand for, and what I radiate.

I have always been the kind of person who (when people attempt to allocate a colour, aesthetic, vibe, song, etc.) never really fits into one category. At first, though trivial, these instances would frustrate me deep down. As I watched a clear, well-fitting aesthetic being allocated to everyone else, I would always brace for the peculiar stare at my face, their hand raising awkwardly as though to physically grab the sparks of my aura, as people attempted to give me a “vibe”.  

Of course, it would always result in a “but you don’t really have a specific vibe” or “you match every colour”.  

Was it laziness? Or did I not put in enough effort to be unique? If people cannot decide what I represent - even in things like colour - will this extend to more significant matters? Why do I allow people to shape who I am?  

To all of these questions - I do not know the answer. 

However, I do know I have become more interested in figuring out: who am I?

I made this blog as a personal journal (I also made this to improve my writing skills because it is at a low-key terrifying decline post-A-levels). I figured it would be fun to make a blog so that my thoughts and musings would be written down so I could look back at my growth.

I intend to become more self-assured (socially and creatively) and more decisive in my likes and dislikes. 

I want to discover and experience and encounter and endure. 

This blog is my attempt at an amateur's self-growing guide to finding who you are - to be unapologetically, unashamedly, and most importantly NATURALLY yourself! 

❀ Iris Locket ❀